Catching you up.

           I’m sure I’ve mentioned it before, but I’ve always wanted to be a writer, everyday I think about writing, sometimes when things happen to me in my life I think about how I would write things, between you and me even when I imagine things I think about how I would write about it. A lot of times I undermine my desire to write with the thought that whatever I would write, I wouldn’t be the first  to write it, doubt is by far my worst enemy . However these days I’m under the impression that even though I not be the first person to say something these are still my thoughts and feelings.

            This past summer has been a real growing experience. Even in times of trouble my family has managed to show their true colors and I’ll be honest with you, there were some that I just didn’t see coming. My little sister for instance has come to my aide several times when she didn’t even have to, usually when this happens I have to hear about it for the rest of my life, but instead, I didn’t even know it was her and when I did she never brought it up. It seems college changes us all. I’m still trying to get to know my older sister. I was hesitant at first to get to know her, not because of her, but because of our father, I’ve gone so long without that part of my family that now as an older person it’s all so new and strange. There are moments when I swear we are twins, we do things so alike, but yet she is so much wiser than me, she has all this experience. She knows what it is to do the things I now find myself going through. Sure it was years ago but the lessons are still the same, she can see through my got it together face and she knows just what to say. The first time I told her I loved her I was afraid, but I meant it, I put my heart out there and she understood my position. We aren’t so different her and I, and yet, we are.

                This semester here at school will be my toughest yet. I can’t pull my usual freshman half effort, this year I have to really work, not only that but this is one of the strongest semesters tradition wise, this semester makes or breaks you tradition wise. It’s so tough, I stay up late and wake up early, I’ve forgotten about a class, slept through work, and found myself with absolutely no time to chill. You would think I would be ready to quit, But I don’t, I have so much going for me right now I want to see it through. I’m spending time with people I don’t usually and my “girls” and I are adjusting to a new level of our closeness, my epic roommate is far far away, and the other girls and I are trying to balance our lives and still be the same we have always been,

This is my life for the moment, its busy, I’m constantly being tested and I’m growing up. The biggest thing I’m going through at the moment is this choice that I need to make, to give up trying to control everything in my life and give it God. I find myself struggling and constantly in thought (what’s new??)