Right now the pungent smell of spray paint will attack you should you walk into my yard, my iTunes is playing random songs in one instant you can hear Dave Matthews band and the next proceed to be serenaded by Jennifer Hudson. Its evening time so things are kind of quite on my country lane…well as quite as it can get in Southwest Alabama. My sister will walk out the door every few minutes announce that I cease all spraying walk by muttering something about my “Weirdness”, get something from my mom’s van and walk back into the house. I ignore her mutterings knowing that just a year ago I was in her shoes. I can’t believe she graduates in less than a week! Speaking of which I need to start making encouraging signs and call the family with gentle reminders…. Lol my job is never done. Speaking of which I still haven’t heard from any of the places I’ve applied for. My roommates will Skype me telling me how she is in the same situation hundreds of miles away. They say we’re getting out of this recession but I would really like to know who they are sometimes and where in the name of Jimmy Buffet they’re getting their information from. My mom just started getting her hours cut, it’s scary right now because I’m dreading the day where they just call her and tell her there is no more work for her. My heart races every time the phone rings and I just pray that things will work out. I knew this would be a tough summer for us, I had prepared myself for hard times just like when I was younger but now that’s its actually here I can’t help but feel like its going to be a lot rougher.
The day before yesterday I was driving the kids home from school when we came upon a kitten on the road it was moving and we went to check on it, it had been thrown out of a car but it was injured in a way that we felt like it could have been saved. We rushed to my mom who rushed to the nearest Vet office 2o minutes away from out hometown. We made better time than that getting there, but it was all in vain. As we got there and explained to the nurse that we had found it and that it needed emergency care she hardly looked from her computer and told us the doctor had just walked into see a dog and wouldn’t be out for a while, my mom asked for the nurse to check the kitten in and she would pay for the doctor to do what he could to save it. The nurse slid a clipboard over and went back to her computer, then informed my mom that all services would have to be paid up front. My mom explained that she could pay them Friday, then woman finally looks up from her computer and in tone that borderlines rude, that it doesn’t work like that….. I had to walk out of the office at that point. I was beyond upset, the woman wouldn’t even look at the animal much less care about the poor thing, the only thing she cared about is money, she made that clear to my mom. I looked in the glass window as my mom hand the urse the kitten, she had to declare it abandoned just so the doctor could look at it, the nurse make a disgusted face as she was gently handed the kitten and I watch was she passed it off to another nurse… Hearing her voice and her tone reminded me of that old nursing teacher who would tell me that nursing was about making money that I shouldn’t care about my patients. It like a lifetime ago that I decided not to be a nurse. I don’t regret all the work I did to achieve what I did, but I do wish I could have known how it all would end, I wish I would have choose years ago to just do what made me happy. I sat in my car and just cried, wishing that this world was less about trying to make money and more about doing the right thing. I understand that that woman has to make a living but I could have done without the I don’t care attitude. But more and more as I go to stores and businesses they have this I don’t care about my customers or the quality of my products and it just frustrates me. I wish I lived in the days where keeping your word as a business and as a professional of any kind meant something. You know were trying to be honorable was a life pursuit…….. My sister tells me when I talk about things like this I sound old fashioned and she just wants to laugh at me. Regardless of other people’s opinions I feel like more and more that whatever I do as my career, I shouldn’t do it for the money. Because even though I may not be the richest person at least I will be happy, at least I will be able to look myself in the mirror and know I didn’t sell out the ability to do the right thing for a few dollars. Call me crazy but at the end of my life, I’d like to be rich in values and good friends and family than the latest fashion and material possessions. Ok ok, I’ll get off my soapbox now. I didn’t mean to bombard you will all this but I needed to let it go.
Ok folks so that’s my wonderful world for the moment, if you wouldn’t mind sending up a kind prayer that I get a job I would be grateful for it. I hope things are ok on your side of the screen, some of your faces I miss like crazy some of your faces I have never met but no matter who you are I hope you’re ok and if not I’m sending you a *hug*. If you’re going through some hard times then I’d like to tell you that good things will come out of it, it’s sort of like how it takes a lot of pressure to make diamonds, times will be rough but we’ll get by and we’ll be better for it in the end.
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